I’m back with another guest post for today’s post! Meraki from The Last Single Sister. She discusses how a life coach could enhance your life – something that I’ve never really considered before.
Despite always being into self-development and following the law of attraction, until recently I thought that life coach’s spouted overpriced new-age mumbo jumbo for pompous privileged pricks. Why would I pay money to have some stuck-up do-gooder tell me to meditate and practice breathwork? As far as I was concerned, I already knew my life’s purpose so there was nothing a life coach could teach me. Shockingly enough, I was 100% wrong.
Towards the end of last year, I started talking to a woman who I had met through a Facebook group that we were both a part of. After several weeks, she told me that she was a life coach, which completely blew my mind. She was not a floopy hipster stuck-up do-gooder at all, in fact, she was far from it. We shared a lot of similar interests and opinions on things, she was very open-minded and I felt really comfortable talking to her (which is novel for me). So, when she offered me a free 1-2-1 session to talk about what I want from life and offer me some no-obligation advice, I decided that I had nothing to lose by accepting the offer.
I was quite guarded and not willing to open up completely on the first call; partly because I was quite an anxious person but also because I had a negative view on life coaching and was dubious of the whole idea. However, there was no need for me to be suspicious, I quickly detected that she genuinely wanted to help people and had no ulterior motive in offering the call. In fact, that call ended with me crying happy tears because, for the first time in my life, I realised that I wanted to be a writer.
The call also helped me realise how low my self-esteem and confidence were and how little enjoyment I had in my life in comparison to what I used to have. I was fascinated, how had she made me feel so empowered to create change after just one conversation? I immediately signed up for a 12-week programme with her. After all, if she can unearth all this from one 45-minute session, what could she do over the course of 12-weeks?
The 12-week course was designed to navigate me along the journey towards self-love by creating a clear vision of what I actually wanted from life and why I wanted it. Once I had my vision, we then started to discover and transform my limiting beliefs introducing a number of ‘tools’ to help me do so.
One of the many limiting beliefs that we worked through was the thought that men only wanted sex from me. This stemmed from a history of child abuse and sexual assault, so to be able to say that this is no longer a belief of mine speaks volumes. Life coaches are not therapists so she did not offer psychological support, but we did look at many ways of overcoming this belief. This included highlighting any positive experiences where men have helped me, in my past and present, without asking for anything in return.
Throughout the 12-weeks we also looked at ways of bringing more joy into my life, creating daily healthy habits and using gratitude to empower, motivate and encourage growth. We had a 1-2-1 call every week where we would look at a number of different things. This could be anything from completing mini workshops and tasks, learning healthy coping mechanisms that could be utilised any time I needed them or just talking (and crying) about something that had caused me upset that week or was hindering my growth.
Working with Claire has provided me with a full toolbox to face any problem thrown my way. It has improved my confidence, helped me realise what I really want from life, provided me with healthy daily practices, improved my overall mood, allowed me to set boundaries and boosted my self-confidence and self-love greatly. This ultimately improved my mental health by helping me overcome my anxiety and better handle my PTSD.
Since completing the 12-week programme, I have started dating again, I am writing a book and I have begun sharing my life story through my blog, to help other women who have faced and are facing the same issues as me, to feel a little less alone.
In short, my original perception of life coaches was so incredibly inaccurate and working with one has not only changed my opinion of men and myself but it has enhanced my life forever.
Here are 10 reasons that I would recommend a life coach to anybody and why I believe a life coach could enhance your life:
Life coaches are NOT therapists
Unlike therapists, they don’t tell you what to do, they simply help you realise your inner strength, wants and desires. They listen to you and use open-ended questions, encouraging reflection and new practices to help you to make the profound and courageous changes in your life that YOU think are right for YOU.
They help provide clarity on what your purpose and wants are in life
Although I do have my dream job, I no longer believe that it is my sole purpose. My passion lies with writing and I was encouraged to explore that, which is what led to the creation of my blog and my book. I now believe that my purpose is to help people in any way that I can, be that through my day job or through sharing my story.
They equip you with tools to use at any point in your life to help you find solutions to problems
Another way that a life coach could enhance your life, is by helping you find solutions to problems. This is so that you don’t need to pay for sessions every week for the rest of your life (unless you want to of course).
They enable you to develop better self-awareness
This helps highlight your strong and weak points to allow you to see where you thrive and where you may need some extra support. Therefore, enabling you to meet your goals in a more productive, proactive and timely manner.
They act as a soundboard
They listen to you if you feel there is nobody else you can talk to. As well as this, they can also help you discover the root cause of your upset as 9/10 there is a deeper reason for your upset than someone stealing your pen at work.
They allow you to re-evaluate your thoughts, feelings, core values and opinions
It is oh too easy to be swayed by external influences but a life coach can help you discover whether these feelings are your own or imposed by assessing whether they align with your core values. I was shocked to see how many external sources influenced my thoughts and opinions. Now, I trust myself enough to know that my opinion is the most important and am not as easily swayed.
They will improve your Self-love & Confidence
Working with a life coach will highlight all of your remarkable qualities and help you see just how much you have to offer this world. Whether you’re looking for love, wanting to progress within your career or just looking to improve your self-esteem; self-love and confidence is the best way to do that.
They help you find balance
Working with a life coach showed me the importance of having fun and how little I did to enjoy myself. Sounds crazy right? Well, when was the last time you chucked on some cheesy 90s music and danced like nobody was watching or did a cartwheel at the park for no reason? When we become adults, we become so focused on work, raising kids, housework etc that we forget that life is meant to be joyful too, so we live for the weekend to ‘blow off some steam.’
Working with a life coach will help you find a healthy balance between fun, relaxation, work and anything else you juggle in life.
Related post: 100 distracts for when you’re having a bad day
They unlock your potential
This happens by facilitating you into becoming the best, most authentic version of yourself. Plus, helping you overcome your fears, eliminate bad habits and keep you motivated.
They help you to live a happier life and better overcome difficulties
Life will always throw hurdles at us to overcome but by utilising the tools that your life coach can provide you with, you are better prepared to handle them. Remember, happiness is the journey, not the destination and the tools that life coaches give you are the maps when you get a little lost.
There are loads of life coaches around to choose from but finding the right one is essential. So, before you book with one do your research, because if you don’t feel comfortable opening up to them, you won’t get the results you deserve.
If it is something you are interested in pursuing, I would highly recommend Claire Porterfield as your first port of call. You can contact her via her website.
Have you ever tried using a life coach?
You can find Meraki on social media below: